BEING TEASED, DOES ANYONE LIKE IT?

Mike and I don’t usually discuss our blog topics before they’re written. We plan who’s responsible for which day, but beyond that, we share our written words when they’re ready for editing. I mention all this because I’m going to expand on Mike’s last blog and I told him when it came out that my next post would be a rebuttal to his.

So, being teased, does anyone like it?

It’s true, my husband loves to tease. Over the past few days, knowing I would be writing this blog, I’ve watched him with our kids.

Mike doesn’t stop teasing. It’s how he breaks the ice. It’s how he inserts himself into the girl's lives. If he can enter a room and immediately say something he knows will get a reaction, he goes for it. He’s hoping the reaction will be a smile but often it's not. Here’s the thing, who really likes to be teased? In Mike’s story about his father he said:

When I was younger, I thought my dad was a bully for teasing me for what I genuinely enjoyed.

It’s only as a man reflecting on the past did he come to see his father was doing it out of love.

I get it, I get it, we tease the ones we love. My dad was a relentless teaser. And my bio dad is just the same. I feel it must be wired into a dad’s DNA. But I HATE BEING TEASED. And you know what, so do our girls.

"Stop"

"Dad don’t"

"Leave me alone"

This is what I hear when Mike is teasing our daughters. He is particularly relentless in his teasing of Camryn. I would say about 80% of their engagement together is him teasing her. She isn't as sensitive to the teasing as perhaps some of our other girls but nonetheless, she doesn't particularly like it. She tolerates it because she likes the attention. Unlike in Mike's story, she does recognize that Mike is doing it out of love.

As for myself, having someone point out my idiosyncrasies, flaws or quarks, isn't always fun. For example, I already know my diet is different from most. Sometimes this means what I'm eating doesn't appeal to others (I'm the lone pescatarian in my house). But I'm about to eat it. You don't have to tell me it looks like sh*t on a plate. You're not eating it. So don't tease me about it.

Now in fairness to my very loving husband, he no longer teases me about what my food looks like. He did listen when I asked him not to tease me about that. And I admit, sometimes what I'm eating doesn't exactly look appealing even if it tastes delicious.

So there you have it. Two completely different sides of the coin. Is Mike going to stop teasing altogether, Ummm, no? Am I going to start liking it? That’s a no as well. But I know my husband is doing it because he loves us.

Shannon, The Herdmother