TREAT YOUR MARRIAGE LIKE IT'S A BUSINESS

Yep, you read that right.

Perhaps some of you read the title and rolled your eyes, thinking that I have a pretty industrial view of my partnership with my wife. You're not alone. When I've openly discussed this view with others, it's often met with disbelief and the assumption that I'm some crazy, controlling male radical.

Quite the opposite, in fact in the previous paragraph I used the term "partnership" in regards to my wife. And by definition, a partnership is a "formal arrangement by two or more parties to manage and operate a business and share its profits."

I simply replace business with marriage, and profits can be viewed as all of the amazing benefits that come with a well-led and lived business.... er, marriage.

When you think about it, a well-run business strives to be efficient, maximizing profits while keeping expenses at a minimum. That's my wife right there. She is the CFO and accountant for our family. NOTHING gets by her. Constantly analyzing the data she discovers ways for us to save a dollar and get the best bang for our buck. All 4 of our girls have a bank account where they are taught to save, invest, donate and wisely spend what they have earned. Regularly she updates me on our current financial situation and which credit card is ok to use so as not to influence the cut-off date, and hinder our credit scores. I sleep well at night knowing that my financial department keeps us in the black.

Finances are just one aspect and an important one (see one of my previous blogs - "Love won't pay the bills, but money won't buy you love") but what are some other business tactics you can apply to marriage? Peruse my list below and watch your marriage become one of the best-run partnerships out there!

1. Choose Someone Who Complements You

The most successful business partnerships are made between people who complement each other well. Neither their weaknesses nor their strengths are the same. The same holds true in marriage. A relationship built between two people with diverse strengths and talents is well prepared for various challenges that couples face.

2. Get and Stay on One Accord

For any business to thrive, you have to be on the same page as your partner with the goals of the business and how you plan to achieve them. In marriage, there has to be a detailed conversation about important matters like family planning (when family planning will begin and the number of children) or financial goals (how you two will build wealth) so that you and your spouse stay aligned. Being a blended family, our business agreement was more of a merger. We like to call it "Westanderveltson Inc." To ensure the marriage continues to thrive we hold marriage meetings. Marriage meetings are a great way to communicate who needs to be where, meal planning, and what we need from each other among other topics. Keep minutes of your meetings and review them at the next one. Every two weeks to once a month is a great start.

3. Create Roles Not role-playing (although this too can be very beneficial to your bottom line of success).

Delegate specific duties to each partner and/or have each partner responsible for one aspect of the business. This helps to streamline the process and day-to-day operations. Discuss the handling of certain items like paying the bills, booking the children’s doctor visits, booking hotel rooms for trips, and so on. Like my wife with the finances, she is the stronger of the two when it comes to this duty. Divide your tasks according to strengths and keep each other in the loop.

4. Ask for help.

Passion and talent are great, but every business needs outside help. So does every marriage, regardless of how great it is. Most successful companies hire consultants to come in and assist with areas in which they are weak. It's called networking. Instead of waiting until you have a major rough patch arise in your marriage, improve your already great relationship by bringing in a consultant (marriage counselor) to discuss any problems that may arise. This will help you articulate what’s on your mind especially if you can’t find the words; therefore, eliminating any built-up frustration. We did and the lines of communication it opened for us were rewarding. Leary of a marriage counselor? Open up to a strong and successful marriage you both know and respect. Experience breeds excellence.

5. Constantly Learn.

The best businesses are ones who are constantly learning about their industry. They stay abreast of trends in their niche and are frequently studying their target market. There’s always more to learn about your spouse as his/her interests might change over the years. You can also learn as they share unknown stories from the past that have helped shape their personality or behaviors. Where you've been can help influence where you're headed. Always build each other up. Win together and learn together. Create and support an environment where you both can thrive.

The best part about looking at marriage like a successful business is that you build the relationship knowing you want to create something that will last generations. (Remember who's watching). Businesses that are built to last have shared priorities and values. Marriages that stand the test of time are built on the same foundation.

Now go build that Fortune 500 marriage!!!

Mike, The Herdfather